Proposal Defense Hearing

This past Spring semester was by far the craziest and busiest I have ever experienced. X10. 

I accomplished so much, but I really hope to never have a semester like this again. In January, I had my preliminary exams and successfully passed! (YAY!) The next big task was to work on my dissertation proposal so that I could pass my proposal defense at a hearing. 

I was also piloting my dissertation study with a small research team. Leading the research team was an adventure, but being able to pilot my study gave me great insights into what my data would look like and how I might write up the results. More importantly, I did a lot of things wrong, so I got to learn from those mistakes. (A post devoted to leading a research team and my study is coming soon.) 

Back to the purpose of this post - proposal defense hearing. This was the most exciting and most scary day of my Ph.D. experience so far. I am used to presenting at conferences and love it, but speaking in front of the four people who get to say "yes" or "no" to me about a subject that is so close to my heart made me extra nervous. 

I worked hard for 3 months writing up by "proposal". This is the "what I plan to do for my dissertation" plan. As I had been running the study this spring, I decided to take the dissertation a step further. In actuality, my dissertation will be a second phase to a much larger study. I cannot wait. 

My incredible family was very supportive, which is a must in graduate school. They sent me flowers the day before my defense.

On the day of my defense, I had called to get light snacks for my committee (muffins, bagels, and fruit). The defense lasted nearly 2 hours! I went through each phase of my larger study and was able to communicate results from the pilot study I had already done. 

The defense was both nauseating and invigorating.

Nauseating because it was scary. I was so nervous and afterwards, all I wanted to do was leave and go on vacation (luckily, I was going to London!). I never believed that people would say you have to love your dissertation because you will hate it by the end. While I don't believe I will hate it, I do believe it will be hard to do things by someone else's design. The most challenging part of academia, at this phase, is pleasing everyone. As a doctoral student, I have to make my committee happy and take some of their suggestions. However, there are 4 people in that room plus me that have slightly different opinions about the best way to do things. 

On the other side, the defense proposal hearing was invigorating. It was wonderful to see a group of academics I respect come together for me to help me succeed. I also enjoyed the suggestions my committee had and feel they will make my final product even better. In many ways, I became closer with some of my committee members after the defense. 

It was two months ago (to the date!), and I am still beyond excited that this part of the journey is over. My advisor told me repeatedly that the proposal defense is the most difficult part. Well, in my case, so far, it has been. 

BUT, it was 100% worth it to be able to say...

Ph.D. Candidate. ABD. All But Dissertation. :)